At first, the culturally sensitive me thought I just needed to be Korean to get it. Then, after much mulling over, I realized this overstuffed hodgepodge is the movie equivalent of Turducken.
You have heard of the Turducken, right? Unlike its distant cousin the Jackalope, the Turducken is not a mythical creature. No, like Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny, the Turducken usually appears once a year. On Thanksgiving, the Turducken magically ships from the deep south enroute to our bellies. This beautiful bird of wondrous taste is actually three avian adversaries rolled into one. See, first you take a chicken, debone it and cram that inside a duck. You then take that duck, also deboned, and shove it inside a turkey. Pack that sucker full of Cajun stuffing (shrimp, andouille sausage, etc.) and serve to your friends and family.
Most people hate the Turducken. They think it’s an abomination of nature, a symbol of everything wrong with American or they think it’s just too damn salty. Me, I could eat the whole damn bird myself. THE HOST, on the other hand, I’ll pass.
The film is a good monster movie, a terrible screwball comedy and a 7th grade anti-American rant all at once. They characters develop traits, behaviors and skills as it fits the filmmakers; no time is spent foreshadowing or explaining these turns. Yes, all the individual ingredients are tasty but, when thrown together haphazardly, it’s a mess. Interesting, but a mess.
Sorry to say it but this film could really benefit from a remake. Someone with a good comic/horror/melodramatic sense, like Sam Raimi or an younger Peter Jackson, could really pull the best out of this flick.
In the end, this one is worth a rental and not a trip to the Arclight.
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